Tonight I intended to blog about an amazing romantic evening spent with a gorgeous woman; sickness has prevented this. Nevertheless, I planned to be disciplined and write something - which segues perfectly into writing about plans.
I find that conversation with some people has no real purpose. We've all experienced this. You start a conversation with cliche greetings, then inquiries into how each other's day/holiday/uni has been, attempt small talk about units and how hard it is to get back to working, and then awkwardly drift apart from the other individual seemingly with NOTHING else to talk about.
This is in stark contrast to conversations with close friends - where topics can flow easily and quickly, and time (forgive the overused saying) flies. There seems to be two main schools of thought here; one that suggests the real difference is "chemistry" or "fate", and another, perhaps more dominant idea that human connections can be 'created' - that individuals can be charmed or won over. Real human connections lie in not just knowledge of the facts surrounding someone's life, but the deeper associated issues; all the varied myriad of emotions and thoughts and feelings and most of all plans linked to the fact.
At the risk of being vague I'll summarize.
An individual's decision to meet a girl one rainy winters night, much like tonight, could be driven by motives kind or cruel; he could be compelled by romantic impulse to woo the girl's heart, or he may be driven to break it to satiate a flagging self esteem. The girl could remind him of some love from long ago, he could be excited, he could be heartbroken, he could be delirious with nostalgia. He could dread the future, miss the past or be so completely content and consumed by the present that he forgets both; and all these feelings and emotions could drive how this one single encounter eventuates.
I don't believe human connections can be formed by any precise formula, I believe we are too wonderfully rash and beautifully imprecise for that. Real connection is an understanding of not only what another person is doing but how they feel, what drives and compels them; and true understanding, short of some rare perfect moments, is hard to come by.
I could easily finish this complete shamble of a ramble with "nothing makes sense" (as suggested by a friend) - but I'll instead say this - value your friends. I've found beautiful and amazing evenings with girls who were totally wrong romantically for me, I have had terrible misunderstandings with the closest of my friends - but neither romance or friendships can be forced, and trying to emulate a connection where there is none has just led to sadness for me. These things are delicate, and should be treated as such.
<3 Del
I find that conversation with some people has no real purpose. We've all experienced this. You start a conversation with cliche greetings, then inquiries into how each other's day/holiday/uni has been, attempt small talk about units and how hard it is to get back to working, and then awkwardly drift apart from the other individual seemingly with NOTHING else to talk about.
This is in stark contrast to conversations with close friends - where topics can flow easily and quickly, and time (forgive the overused saying) flies. There seems to be two main schools of thought here; one that suggests the real difference is "chemistry" or "fate", and another, perhaps more dominant idea that human connections can be 'created' - that individuals can be charmed or won over. Real human connections lie in not just knowledge of the facts surrounding someone's life, but the deeper associated issues; all the varied myriad of emotions and thoughts and feelings and most of all plans linked to the fact.
At the risk of being vague I'll summarize.
An individual's decision to meet a girl one rainy winters night, much like tonight, could be driven by motives kind or cruel; he could be compelled by romantic impulse to woo the girl's heart, or he may be driven to break it to satiate a flagging self esteem. The girl could remind him of some love from long ago, he could be excited, he could be heartbroken, he could be delirious with nostalgia. He could dread the future, miss the past or be so completely content and consumed by the present that he forgets both; and all these feelings and emotions could drive how this one single encounter eventuates.
I don't believe human connections can be formed by any precise formula, I believe we are too wonderfully rash and beautifully imprecise for that. Real connection is an understanding of not only what another person is doing but how they feel, what drives and compels them; and true understanding, short of some rare perfect moments, is hard to come by.
I could easily finish this complete shamble of a ramble with "nothing makes sense" (as suggested by a friend) - but I'll instead say this - value your friends. I've found beautiful and amazing evenings with girls who were totally wrong romantically for me, I have had terrible misunderstandings with the closest of my friends - but neither romance or friendships can be forced, and trying to emulate a connection where there is none has just led to sadness for me. These things are delicate, and should be treated as such.
<3 Del
No comments:
Post a Comment